The 156 page story

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  • The meager plain rice collected carelessly in his bowl represented his hopes and aspirations, and each one Ment slowly digested, obtaining it's taste and then dismissing it as a distraction from his true goal. He did this over and over again until the bowl was empty. He reached towards his beard to the bowl's worth of rice of rice he knew was in there when one of the elders walked up to him and started to speak. It was the full, reverberating voice of the Elder Nhin-Comphoo, obviously come to reassure Ment on his troubled quest. How he could be so friendly without hope for others no one knew.

    "Hello, Menteh. I see you are facing inner troubles. May I help? -No, don't answer, I already know you. Did you know that this very place was once occupied by a quite mad person, one who took in the spirit of power and body of hate instead of his own? Yes, you already know him, it was FURB, and excuse me for saying this, but kicking his a$$ outta here was the funnest thing I've done in years."
  • It was at that Point, Another Pokemon stumbled into the Temple, Looking at Ment he suddenly....
  • Dismissed it, the temples do this to some mortals....was FERB's comforting words, he and ment continued up the large stone steps and into the main structure at the top, they were suprised to find that it wasnt a place of great power or a weapon atop this temple, it was a museum, ancient artifacts lay, still in place but with covered with dust, yet there was still an ominous sense of dark energy pulsating from the floor....
  • Ment stumbled on a big, mansize strange and rectangular device, the strange words "COCA-COLA" read on top with white letters on a red background.

    "What's this?"

    Asked ment, eager to know of this unknown contraption

    Elder Nhin-Comphoo, looked at ment and with all his wisdom he said:
  • ... its a drink you moron! ment lent over to case to grab on if the smaller devices inside the big device... and...
  • ... Grabs one, opens it and just as he's about to drink he notices the skeleton of a man with a bag behind an exhibition, upon asking about this the Elder says it was a man who was found like that on the mountains, presumably from a different and distant time, in his bag there were a ball of yarn and fozilised pokegore, they're still there but it's just crap...
  • And suddenly the yarn turns back into Jack! Jack yawns.
  • ...Then suddenly... Apples.
  • FURB turns over in his grave.
    Jack coughs up yarn.
    The Coke was apple flavored.
    Machinery that has waited for hundreds of years suddenly starts...
  • exploding, which causes the yarn to spontaneously combust, Jack didn't realise this, so he ended up back in hospital.
  • Back on a stretcher, and with three doctors trying to take the burning ball of yarn out of his hands, Jack is visited by the mayor of #0x0034bb , he's congratulated for destroying Prof. Nhin-Compo's evil lair that hosted unspeakable evils, actually they just looted the museum and made profit.
    Jack's given a handshake and the mayor takes a picture with him, then leaves.
    The mayor's officials confiscate the ball of yarn, which alerts Jack..

    Now stripped of his ball of yarn, and ultimate treasure and mission, Jack looks at the now closed door, his hands are bandaged, he looks a lot like darkman, and taking a decisive course of action, he proceeds to..
  • Go build himself a TARDIS and in the meantime, he upgrades his mechanical eye with x-ray vision :D
    Oh and recover his ball of yarn
  • Which spontaneously combusts again...
  • His mechanical eye also spontaneusly combusts..
  • Which causes his clothes to catch on fire... Quickly.
  • Demoncard roasted some marshmellows over Jack.
  • Meanwhile, Snowfire didn't succesfully quit meth
  • While Zipperdude ate some Waffles... That belonged to Bear.
  • Bear decided that enough was enough, so he found Zip about to nom on his last waffle right next to a sheer cliff fall.
  • Bear pushed Zipperdude off the cliff. Zipperdude was yelling "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO..."
  • however, zipperdude managed to nom on his waffle one last time, before landing on..
  • Bear, who was at first like "WTF!" And then like, "BOOM!!!" while Zipperdude laughed uncontrollably.
  • the only thing deathborn could do while witnessing this gigantic clusterfuck of events, was...
  • nom on bears calcinated body
  • Making his bones extremely strong from bear being over 9000% calcium. He then decides to...
  • Put back on his mjolnir mark IV suit and...
  • decided that he didn't like it, so he took it off. And put on a cat costume!
  • and went to kill the convenant armed with his kitty paws and ears!
  • And then UNSC Pillar of Autumn and UNSC Unto the Dawn emerged from slipspace.
  • And due to there being no timezones in space, they crashed into each-other, both rupturing their Shaw-Fujikawa drives and completely accidentally the Halos.
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